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Just who do you think you're talking to? DID Post

I carry a secret deep within, one that has always been there, but recently given light to.

I look like a typical person, talk like a typical person, and for the most part act like a typical person.

However, just behind my eyes, there's a whole world of people. There are old ones, young ones, male and female, and even a demon or an angel depending on the day.

And there is me. The Host. The Main Me System. Controlled by these multitudes of persona's who came to life because of tragedy and trauma, from suffering, and pain. Neglect and abuse. When each was born, it's hard to say. For some they've been there from day one.

Throughout my life. these imaginary people always spoke to me. Telling me to run away from a situation if there was danger. Keeping a keen ear on 14 different conversations while still actively listening to the person in front of me. Of consulting with me in real time like I'm having a telepathic conversation. Of distant thousand-yard stares, and moments of lost time. Of times where a monstrous violence took over and I watched from some ethereal realm.

All the voices, I thought were monologue from parts of me that were my imagination. Only to find out that they are voices of my compartmentalization. Bore of stressful, sad, painful times. Fractions of psyche that formed a way for what happened to me, to make sense of it all.

A common thing in my daily life is a phrase that I have learned to hate "remember we talked about this" or "you said you were going to do..." when present memory holds no such discussion. I want to say "Just who do you think you're talking to" because I have no memory of it. Yet part of me remembers line by line as if rehearsed by some Shakespearian actor about to preform before Nobility, words, actions, sights, smells, and feelings, of a Tuesday morning in April of 1984 when the kindergarten teacher introduced me to using chopsticks and eating seaweed. Of how sweet she was, and how strong her perfume always was, but how comforting it was as well. Of how her midwestern dress style always ruffled around her and the faint scratching sound from the nylon pantyhose she wore. How through her coaching and loving celebration and pride at watching me recite my numbers to 100 and getting into The Hundred's Club. Of her soft flabby arms squeezing me with a face burying bosom hug. Yet you speak to me of a conversation we allegedly had just moments ago? Who were you talking to? Why is it that at this time of my life, a memory as fresh as that is recalled, yet our conversation isn't?

Which one of the many did you speak with, and how can I retrieve the mental voice mail left while gone from the fronting? Why is it that a toy can spark so much joy in my life, but a thousand dollars is cold and joyless and to a certain extent unwanted? Why is it that somedays I feel more like a woman, as I am dressing myself, styling my hair, and reaching for the perfume vs the rugged male locker room spray, with its deep musky, earthen undertones? Why is it that though I hate being told what to do, place me in an office environment and I am happy and content being a secretary and making cold calls and checking in appointments as people arrive.

Because those voices, have lives, have specialties, and autonomy and I as the conscious side seat passenger must watch my life being lived by another. Who is this person who lives my life, while I feel helpless? It's me, but it's not me me. It's a persona. A voice who lives in my head. With full knowledge of the world, its workings, and machinations therein. A strange shifting fog from productive "on top of it" worker, to an almost know nothing person, who goes blank thinking about how to do the task at hand.

Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) is a mental health condition that's often misunderstood, even though it affects an estimated 1% of the population. You might have heard it referred to as "Multiple Personality Disorder," but that's an outdated term that doesn't really capture the complexity of the experience.

Essentially, DID is characterized by the presence of two or more distinct identities or personality states within one individual. These identities, often called "alters," can have their own names, ages, genders, personal histories, and even unique ways of speaking or behaving. It's important to emphasize that these are not separate people living in one body, but rather different expressions of a single individual's fragmented sense of self.

DID most commonly develops as a response to severe and repeated trauma during early childhood. Experiences like physical, sexual, or emotional abuse, particularly within the context of a child's primary relationships, can be incredibly overwhelming and damaging. In these situations, a child may dissociate, or mentally separate themselves, from the traumatic experience to survive. This act of dissociating helps to compartmentalize the trauma, making it easier to endure, but can also lead to the development of distinct identities that hold different memories and emotional burdens related to the trauma.

Life for individuals with DID can be incredibly challenging and confusing. One of the most significant struggles is dealing with gaps in memory, also known as amnesia, as different alters take control and the individual may not recall what happened while another identity was active. Imagine feeling like you’re “losing time” or discovering items you don't remember buying – this is a frequent experience for people with DID. This can create a sense of disorientation and disconnect from one's own life.
Furthermore, DID can significantly impact relationships and daily functioning. The unpredictable nature of switching between alters can make it hard to form stable relationships or hold down a job. Individuals with DID may also struggle with other mental health issues, such as depression, anxiety, and self-harm, which can further complicate their lives.

Unfortunately, DID is often sensationalized and misrepresented in media, leading to harmful stereotypes and misconceptions. It's crucial to remember that individuals with DID are not dangerous or "crazy," but rather people who have endured extreme trauma and are doing their best to cope. It's important to approach this topic with empathy and a willingness to learn and challenge our own biases.

While DID is a complex condition, it is treatable. Psychotherapy, often involving trauma-focused therapies, plays a central role in helping individuals with DID process their past experiences, manage their symptoms, and integrate their identities. Support groups and a strong network of understanding friends and family can also be incredibly beneficial.
If you or someone you know is struggling with symptoms that might suggest DID, please reach out to a mental health professional. Seeking help is a sign of strength, and with the right support, individuals with DID can learn to manage their symptoms and build more fulfilling lives.

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atherosclerotic lesions Atlanta alcohol rehab Atlanta drug abuse rehab centers Atlanta Drug Rehab Atlanta Drug Rehab Center attack Avengers back on track back to school backup bad habbits baking banana george Banana Power bariatric surgery Barrett's Esophagus Baton Rouge battle depression bayer bayer breeze2 Bayer Contour USB bb gun BBB BE beating depression beauty become motivated before i die behealthy24.com Being sick totally sucks beta cells big blue test big foot Biomedtrics biosensor bipolar Bipolar bipolar disorder Birdman Birdman or The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance birth birth defects birthday bladder cancer blog blogging blood glucose blood glucose levels blood pressure blood sample blood sugar blood sugar level blood sugar levels blood sugar monitor blood sugars blue shield Bluetooth bmi Body By Vi 90 Day Challenge body mass index bogo bogo. buy one get one free books bottom belly bracelet Brain Discovery Could Help Schizophrenics Breaking News breast breast feed breast feeding breastfeed breastfeeding brew Broadway budget bug out bugs bullied bullying Bums burn calories buy Caffeine Vape Stix by Energy Shisha california California Pacific Medical Center call center caloric needs calorie versions cancer candychang.com Cannabidiol cannabis car car loan. car; car loan; payday; payday advance; sponsored blog; guest post; carats cardio cardiovasular disease care cause cctv security dvr cd review Celebration celiac cell phone change cheap eyeglasses cheap glasses cheap scrub cheap scrubs check into cash cheif chicago child childhood depression Childhood diabetes childhood obesity children cholesterol christmas chronic inflammatory disease chronic pain cigarette ciglites cigs clinical depression clothing coconut oil coffee coffee prevents diabetes cognitive cold colorectal cancer Comedy Central comfort food community compare computer Computer Services condos connections contour usb meter control cooking corn syrup cosmetics coupons couponten.com crafts creative outlook credit card cupcake cyber bullying daily caloric daily caloric intake dancing dark cloud david pulley Day 3 of taking Lexapro and Victoza day care daycare ddiabetes deals Death debate debit card debt decaffeinated coffee decreased gene activity deep breathing dementia Dental Work and Tooth Pain depressed Depressed Stroke Survivors May Face Triple the Risk of Death depression depression in preschoolers depression isn depression symptoms Despite Free Health Care developing diabetes development diabetes Diabetes / Diabetic News Diabetes + Depression = Increased Risk of Death diabetes exist diabetes foundation diabetes less diabetes management diabetes medication Diabetes Trials Worldwide Are Not Addressing Key Issues In Affected Populations diabetic diabetic alert dog diabetic cook book diabetic cure diabetic education videos diabetic epipen diabetic food log diabetic healing diabetic insulin diabetic logbook diabetic medical review diabetic research Diabetic Retinopathy diabetic shock diabetic software diabetic supplies diabetic. ebook diamonds diet digital camera digital logbook direct Direct Association Between Type 2 Diabetes And Obesity Found direct tv directionless dirve disability disabled disease disorders Disrupting Our Internal Clocks May Lead To A Complete Absence Of 24-Hour Bodily Rhythms And An Immediate Gain In Body Weight Ditto divorce lawyer diy mouse trap dlucose doctors donation doomsday Doughnuts down range Drexel University drinking drive drop out drug drug abuse drugs dry skin DSHS dvd e-cig e-cigarettes e-juice e-reader e-zines eastern medicine eating disorders ecigarettes Economics education Edward Norton effective treatments egg whites egg yolks electri vehicle electrical stimulation Electronic emergency emergency kit Emma Stone emotional employment empty nest EMR endocrine engraved medical id ereader ev everyone else eviction excess weight exercise exercise regularly exercise routines exterminators eye eye care eye disease eye glasses EyeBuyDirect eyebuydirect.com facebook fad diet fad diets family focused therapy Family Time fashion fatty acids favorite foods FDA feel fuller fire fish oil fitness Fitness Professionals Appreciate Online Continuing Education Options Fitness; Obesity; Diabetes; Molecular Biology; Mice; Biology flights florida Florida health kids program flu food Food and Dining food diary food network foods contain forgetfulness four more years free free android apps free diabetic wristband Free Stuff french fries fresh flowers fresh fruit Fresh Vending Machines fructose fructose corn syrup fruit full moon funeral Gadgets gangnam style Gastroesophageal gastroparesis GE X500 Power Series genes genes linked to bipolar GERD gestational diabetes Gestational Diabetes Patients Will Develop Type 2 Diabetes Give Aways giving glasses glooko glucagon Gluco(M) Glucofact glucose glucose levels glucose log glucose management glucose meter gluten free glycemic control glycemic foods glycemic index glycemic indexes godaddy google gout grain foods green tea group guest blog guest post hair loss handicap accessible vans handicap minivans handicap vans handicapped vans happy Happy Birthday Hello Cupcake It's Me happy birthday to me :) happy holidays Harvey Birdman hba1c health health benefits health care healthier fast food healthy healthy foods healthy lifestyle healthy snack hearing loss heart heart attack heart broken Heart Disease; Cholesterol; Stroke Prevention; Diseases and Conditions; Chronic Illness; Heart Disease; Cholesterol; Stroke Prevention; Diseases and Conditions; Chronic Illness; diabetes Heart Disease; Cholesterol; Stroke Prevention; Diseases and Conditions; Chronic Illness; stroke Heart Disease; Cholesterol; Stroke Prevention; Diseases and Conditions; Chronic Illness; Vioxx heart monitor heart on my sleeve heart problems heart rate heath and beauty hello hellocupcakeitsme.com help hemoglobin Her high blood sugar high school High-Fat Foods May Be A Factor In Glucose Control hiv hiv1 hiv2 hobbytron.com holiday holiday's home security alarms home testing Homeless Homeless Shelter Homer Simpson honda hospitalization Household Income Affects Chronic Disease Control In Kids Humalog Human IPSC Humor Humulin R U-500 hunger hungry hurt on the job hyperglycima hyperglycimic hypertension hypoglycemia hypoglycemic hypoglycemic episode iBGStar Blood Glucose Monitoring System Ice Cream Image improvement including mufa foods infection infested infographic information injury inspriation insulated bag Insulin insulin injections insulin patch insulin pump insulin shot record insurance claims internal medicine Interspecies Transplant investments ios ios 5 iphone iphone 4 its iTunes Iwerkz Foldable Bluetooth Keyboard Review Jenna Mables jewelry joann joann fabric and craft store joint pain Journal of Alzheimer's Disease juwait Keek kenguru ketoacidosis occurs kicking the habbit kid kidcare kids Killings kindle kindle fire kitchen counter kombucha Labor and Industry Lamp;I lantus Late-Life Depression lawyer learning issues legal help Lexapro LG Rumor libido life lifestyle changes light box lincoln Link Between Creativity and Mental Illness Confirmed in Large-Scale Swedish Study Lipohypertrophy living loan Lone Star College Shooting loneliness lose weight losing weight loss plan lost low blood sugar low glucose levels Low income cell phone low income glasses low t low testosterone lower glucose lowering lowering glucose levels Luminaze lung health lyrics lyrics of depression Mainframe Support makeup managing diabetes Manic marijuana market mary lambert Master Card maya angelou Maya Angelou dead at 86 me meal plan meal prepping meals require medflash media / television medicaid Medical medical condition medical help Medical Review Medical Studies medical studies. medicare medicare part d medication medicines meditation melody road memory loss men's health Mental Health mental health issues Menu menu options merry christmas metabolic syndrome metabolism metabolites metersync blue miami Michael Keaton microstimulator military minimum purchases mission d.a.d mission dad Mixed Results On Computer-based Support For Diabetes mobility money money saving moods motivation mourning movie review Movie Reviews music music thearpy musings/thoughts/ideas must have MV-1 n-3 Fatty Acids Nanoparticle Suspension and Ultrasound Deliver Insulin Without Regular Injections natural home remdies natural suppliments need needing help needles needy negative thoughts neil diamond Network/Community networking new app new baby New Jersey's Universtiy of Medicine and Dentistry new medication New smart contact lens could monitor glucose for diabetics Nick Jonas night lights nissan no insulin Nook Tablet BNTV400 Review north aferica nova nordisk Now that the holidays are over obama obama phone obama wins 2012 obese Obesity obituries OCD ODD Oil Pulling Olycap omega-3 onetouch online magazines online medical records optical zoom optical123.com Optimus ERM optogenetics oral health oral hiv test oral swab oraquick overcome depression Oxygen paid marketing pancreas parental depression parkinsons party passing Paula Deen pay attention payday payday advance paying kids to attend school pedometer personal food chart Personal Post pest pests photography pills ping plam beach county Plays poet port townsend positive thoughts Postpartum Depression pot prayer pre-owned pre-school pregnancies pregnancy prepper prepping preschool prescription president prevent complications prices processed foods product Product Review products Progress Project 1811 project rudolph proline promo codes promotional Promotions psoriasis Psy public health publich education purchas questioning quit smoking raisins reaching out real butter real-estate really scare rearrange recipes Record red meat red wine reefer reflux regenerate regular exercise rehab remodel research resistance resource resources retail therapy retinopathy revamp review Reviewing the Vapourlites Blueberry/Strawberry E Juice revitalift rich foods risk roller coaster russia rx s.a.d sadness safe sex safelink Safelink wireless sale salt Sandy Hooks Elementary School Schooting saving money savings scar school School Shooting schooling scrubs for cheap seasonal affective disorder Seattle self diagnosis self help self love self medicating senior resources seo sesame seed oil sex Shindigz Coupon Code Shootings shopping Short story shot record sick side-effects simple tips SIN TAX Site Review skin care skin tags skip meals skipping meals sleep sleep apnea smaller meals smart car smart cars smart phone smoker smokes smoking social media social security sodium software sore throat sores south beach south beach diet spiral notebook sponsored sponsored review sponsored; lawyer; family; legal; issues; sponsored/guest post spot removal. ssi Statin Labels stem cell stock pile stomach pain stoner stop smoking store stress stretch marks study submit submitted substitutions successfully lose weight sugar free sugar levels sugary foods suicidal thoughts suicide Supplementation Of Alternative Fuels Could Protect The Brain During Hypoglycemia support surgery survival systemic inflammation taboo tai chi take out tax tea tech teen teen mental health teens television temporary mood test animals test strips testicle testicular cancer testing testing supplies testosterone thanksgiving the learning company the lines project. #thelinesproject thearpy therapy thought Three Devastating Statistics of Diabetes Medical Malpractice title to write love on her arm tone Tosh.O toxins Tracfone trained professional transaction travel treatment trend diets tribute to my father triglycerides tsa tweets twitter twloha type 3 diabetes type-1 type-2 type-2 diabetes U.S. Medicare Part D Can't Explain North-South Disparities UK News ultra long acting UMDNJ underlying reasons Undiagnosed Pre-Diabetes Highly Prevalent in Early Alzheimer's Disease Study unhealthy unhealthy foods up and coming artist up and down upcoming holidays update uric acid usb value of a dollar vans for handicap vans for handicapped vans for wheel chairs mobility vans vans for wheenchairs vape vapor vapourlites vendor Veterans Day Video violation violence Visa Visiting Your Doctor Following ER Care For Chest Pain Reduces Risk Of Heart Attack vitamin d vitamin deficiency walking walking chart walnuts contain washington water waterski weed week in review Week of learning weigh yourself weighing yourself weight weight loss weight loss chart weight loss goals weight loss plan weight loss program weight loss success weight loss tips weight slowly what is it What Your Skin Says About Your Health wheel chair wheel chair vans wheelchair wheelchair vans where to buy cheap scrubs whipped butter winter blues womens health Work Out workman's compensation workout X-Men x500 xanax Xenotransplantation Young people with diabetes dying due to lack of adequate healthcare Yourtel youtube YouTube Internet Sensations Then and Now

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