Helping someone grieve

Recently there has been a lot of death in my life. First, I found out that a friend/ex-roommate of mine committed suicide. Then, a friend of mine has a son, whose best friend passed from a brain tumor at the age of 11. Then my other friend, found her mother in law dead this morning. I have been trying to help my friends cope and deal with the loss in their lives. My friend "Stacy" (name withheld) has been the hardest to help. Her son, only 11 or 12 himself, is having to deal with the loss of a friend and someone who he had a special relationship with, has been the toughest. Death is never easy at any age. But to try and help a child, who is suffering and hurting past the point of a kiss and hug to fix is something completely different.
I never experienced death or loss as a child. It wasn't until I was 14 that I had experienced it first hand, with the passing of my Grandfather ( Dad's side) and Grandmother (on my biological mothers side) that I had ever attended a funeral. In my family, your emotions were to be put to the side. You weren't really "allowed" to be sad for any period of time, outside of the first week or so of the loss.

Being Bipolar, I think really kept me from processing the emotions the way that I should. As a friend I just offer my shoulder to cry on, and a listening ear. I try to take into consideration that who ever is talking to me during their time of need. They only needs me as a sounding board, nothing else.
I feel like a hallow monster though, because as much as my heart is breaking for that person, I sit there stone faced and many times emotionless just so the other person feels ok, when inside im torn up.
My walling things up only to have them hit me full force later, has been the bane of my existence. I teared up talking with Stacy, about the pain and suffering that she is going through on behalf of her son's pain. Telling someone who is baring their heart and hurting soul to you, that everything is going to be ok, is like adding gas to fire. We all know its going to be "ok" but saying it seems to be the only response that we are able to give when words fail us. My heart is breaking for Stacy and her family, as they are having to deal with this.

Selfishly though, I am trying not to put to much of my own emotion into this time, as I know it would drag me into my depression even deeper and dredge up some old memories that I am able to hide away. Because I too can lament about the losses in my life. The pain of absents, and the feeling of loneliness afterwards. All I can do is hope and pray to whatever god is listening, that the hearts of those who are suffering from loss right now, can be eased and heald quickly.

Take time to take stock of the people in your life. Forgive them of what you can. Let them know that you love them, while you can. Say the words that you hold yourself back from saying, because tomorrow may be to late.