Random musing

 Good morning people

Remember that your journey in life has many ups and downs. Sometimes you'll climb those ups with ease, and sometimes you'll slide back down. The main thing to focus on is the destination. Enjoy your journey too. Embrace the suck. And learn your lessons along the way. Offer a helping hand even to those who wouldn't do the same. We all are at different places in our own personal journey. We all come into each other's lives for a reason. Some come to teach us, some come to learn from us, and some come to just be characters along the way. There are no negative sittuations, only teachable moments. Yeah they cause us to feel bad about what's happening, cause us to feel  depressed, or even cause us to cry. But those tears cleanse our souls and make us grow. Take time to look in the rearview mirror, but don't forget to look ahead too. Only glance at where you've been, and how far you've come. We can make a thousand excuses and blame everything in the world, but if you aren't putting one for forward, then you'll never take those steps needed to continue moving forward, even a flat tire can still roll.

You can't let the chains of the past and the neverending what if's hold you back. Forgive yourself and forgive others so that you can rid yourself of those unhealthy trauma's and energies. So what if someone did something crappy to you, do you think that their actions against you is keeping them from living their life? NO! So why should that situation keep you from moving forward and living your life. Forgive them for yourself and put that pain to rest. It's not serving you, it's not helping you, it's not doing good for you. Grow from the pain, learn the lessons therein, and move past the trespasses.  Don't become jaded or complacent either. Only you can push past your barries, otherwise you before stagnate and let precious time slip by. We are only given so much time, no one knows when their clock will stop.

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I did a thing

 So I've done a thing. I joined the YMCA and it's been a really interesting choice so far. So I've needed to start working out since I haven't been able to walk. So I've started doing water aerobics. Y'all when I tell you it's been kicking my butt, that's a bit of an understatement. My legs hurt so bad. But I'm sure it'll get better the more I do it.

I'll be covering my adventures on YouTube channel www.youtube.com/hellocupcakeitsme and on the podcast www.anchor.fm/hellocupcakeitsme 

Right now it's only Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. But I'm hopeful that it will pick up and be offered 5 days a week.

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My Cirkul Water experience

I dont endorse or tell yall about things I dont try and like myself. And its no difference with this product. Not only is it budget friendly but I just love it.

Lets face it, drinking water is no fun. After awhile you just go through the motions. But why would you when you could get yourself Cirkul? What is Cirkul? It is a great way to drink more water and add a little flavor while doing so.

What makes Cirkul unique (besides the spelling?) is the Sips cartridges that provide you with up to 6 20oz bottles of flavor infused water, not only make you want to drink more water, but in doing so you are saving on plastics and other landfill. You also get to dial in the flavor. So if you like really strong strawberry taste, then your setting may be a 6 or 9 for max flavor. Do you only want a hint of Peach Mango? Then a 2 or 4 is the setting for you. Do you only want a sip of water, then dial it to 0 and get your drink on.

The other thing that is amazing about Cirkul is that they have a new water filter cartridge that is only $10 and will filter more than 15 gallons of water. So you can have the purest water, and the most amazing flavors at hand whenever you need to take a drink of water.

And when you use the link below you get a great discount, and free shipping. So take a moment and check out all the great selection of flavors, bottle options, and become a member of the #CirkulFamily

https://drinkcirkul.com/share/Michael-V6104628265050

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Back at it

  Well I am going to give it another go. I have been sedentary for two years now. My back, my legs, and other parts of my body have begun to suffer. I can barely stand for any length of time. I find it difficult to walk. I was doing so good, and that god damn kidney stone took it all from me.

If I continue on the path I am now, I will probably be totally immobile within the next year or two. So this is day 2 of me doing my little bit of exercise. Of drinking 1 gallon of water a day with apple cider vinegar in it, and making sure I dont go over my daily caloric intake.

Im not the praying type, but I do hope that I can find the strength and stamina to do this again and keep it up this time.

Help keep me motivated. Follow me over on YouTube and on the Podcast

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The 4th of July

Many people celebrate the 4th of July for different reasons. Some its a holiday to get drunk and have a BBQ, others its for the celebration of our freedoms. For me, it is a little bit of both. But mostly as a time of getting together with friends and family to celebrate being together. And it will always hold a special place in my heart. My dad absolutely loved the 4th of July. 
Early in life he established it as a great traditional pass time for me. Every year we would go to the firework stand and get as much as his hard earned money could buy us. And with eager anticipation I would stare wide eyed at all of the pretty packages of explosives, like a kid looking at presents under a christmas tree. Night time couldn't come soon enough. I would count down the seconds leading up to sunset and the hour afterwards so that for just a few moments, a years worth of hard work and savings would burn up in loud noise and colorful arrays of flaming brilliance. 

It was my dad's time to be a kid again. To light each of the little boxes, and shoot into the sky fountains of multicolored sparks and deafening booms. He would laugh and run back and forth between them. Being a child and naive of the hardships of making money, and raising a family, and all the responsibilities of being an adult, it was to me, never enough. I always wanted more and more fireworks. I dont think that it was from a place of greed, but from a place of happiness and seeing him enjoy himself, and how it typically brought the family together. 

Even once I was in my teens and even in my early adulthood. We would gather to watch fireworks even if we didnt set them off ourselves. I could feel his excitement as we would watch them. Now that he is gone, the 4th isnt really the same anymore. I still gather with friends and family. And I hold his laughter in my heart. 

So today when you gather with your friends and family. Dont say harsh words. Remember the time that you have with them and make great memories. Dont blow anything off  either!

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Pride Month

June has been deemed Pride Month and as such so on the YouTube channel I am showcasing a member of the LGBT+ Community on each video. The first video I did today was on Brandon Teena, who was a transgender man who was murdered and raped you can watch the video here. 

The next video is on Mathew Shepard. I am hoping to shed light on hate crimes and help others to LGBT History. So I hope that you will take some time to go visit the YouTube channel and learn about these amazing men and women.

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Feeling Blissful

Over the last few days I have felt rather blissful. Im still battling the last leg of Covid. I'm past my 10 day infectious stage. But I have this damn lingering cough, sore throat, and ear infection. The doctor's will not do shit about it, and I honestly believe that its "punishment" for not being vaccinated. But one good thing did come from getting Covid. I was given an iPad Air 2 and a MacBook Air. I've never been an Apple person. But I now find myself in possession of 3 iPhones, 2 MacBook's, an iPad, a iPod Shuffle, and a 80gb 5th Generation iPod Video. Out of all of those devices, the iPod Video was the first. I got it as a gift from my sister back in 2005. Yes they all still work. 

Ive been using the iPad to go to school and do classes online through Alison.com and for playing my favorite matching game Match Masters, and just recently, to watch videos on it. With the MacBook Air, I had to reinstall the whole OS and upgrade it from OS X Lion to High Sierra. I also had to upgrade the battery on it as it was bad and wouldn't hold a charge. So I was able to find a new replacement battery on eBay for $18 with free shipping and the tools needed to open it up and preform the upgrade. I watched 9 different YouTube videos on how to do the battery and how to reformat the computer and do a clean install on it. 

Mind you I am a PC person and the bulk of my computer repair and operation knowledge lies therein. So all of this is new territory for me, and I must admit that I really have enjoyed learning a new system. I want to do more with the newer MacBook. I want to upgrade the hard drive (SSD) on it and install new memory to boost it from being 128gb SSD and 4gb ram to 1tb and 16gb ram. But finding the funding to do so is very difficult. The cheapest 1tb SSD I have found is about $120 and the ram about $60. And well living on the $0.00 that I do, it may not happen anytime soon.

My friend made the Magneto sticker for it, she works at a vinyl shop and did it for free saving me $15 its only off by a fraction of a centimeter, but its ok, I love it. I agonized over trying to decide on which sticker I wanted on the back, and out of about 15 choices, I chose Magneto, and asked her if she could do it and here it is.

Outside of the whole geeking out on computers and what have you. I have been geeking out over the show Downton Abby. I haven't been that drawn into a tv show in a long time. And now that I have finished the whole series on Netflix, I am debating on going to the movies to see Downton Abby the New Era or wait for it to come out on DVD. And other than that, my cat has become more at home, and constantly showing me new sides of his personality. I will fully admit that I am not as attached to him as I was Bella, and I hope that someday I will be. Dont get me wrong, I freaking love that dork, but its not the same right now as it was for Bella and I. But I have only had him less than a full 3 months. So Im sure with time Ill grow to love him just as much. Here is a video of him being extra geeky and this is legit something he just started doing.

 

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What to do

 So as per usual I get a midnight phone call about the biological egg carton, telling me that she is back on her way to the hospital and that she is being well HER!

I honestly don’t know what to do about her, let alone do I actually want to do anything about her. My night was peaceful and nice, just watching the Simpson’s and playing with my cat. Now a kind of gloom has set in. It’s not the stress of “oh my poor old mom is in the hospital what ever shall I do” its more of, well shit, now what. She’s on a self destructive journey and has it in her head that living on the streets at 71yrs old is going to be the best thing for her. The people she is staying with currently are doing their best, or so they tell me that they are, to take care of her.

I really would like to see her placed into a facility and just become a ward of the state as it were, so we wouldn’t have to worry about the what if’s all of the time. But honestly I have no idea what the next step is, let alone the future. Just sweep it under the rug for now I guess, until something can be done.

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Being sick as single adult

 When you are younger and you get sick, its almost like a holiday. As an adult, its anything but. As a kid you are waited on hand and foot. You got to watch The Price is Right, drink 7-Up, and ear the almighty Chicken Soup with saltine crackers. As an adult you wander around your house aimlessly. Searching for whatever comfort you can find. If you are hungry, you have to find the food and cook it yourself. With a raging fevor as hot as the skillet you are cooking in. Then you have to doctor yourself up, eat your food which is probably burned because you were zoning out in a sickness induced fevor dream.

As a kid, the passing of time had no bairing on you. As an adult you look at the clock and realizing that your days are flying by. You contiune to worry about bills, getting back to work, and everything between. I am a bit of the both. I am a single adult, who doesn’t work due to medical retirement, and I watch the days tick by. At the time or writing this, its been 6 days since I started getting sick. Im constantly tired. My fevor comes and goes, and all the food in the house needs to be cooked and I have no staminia to make any of it.

In short, I wish I was still at home being looked after by my grandmother or my mom. I dont want to be an adult right now lol. But what do you do, but get better as fast as you can and get back to life right?

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The spring and it's changes

 With spring in full bloom things are starting to look up for the better. My depression is slowly going away. I've even been gifted some really nice things! I've been given an iPad Air 2, and a MacBook. I've as yet got the MacBook to work as the power cord didn't work so now I'm waiting for it to come.

I'm actually writing this post on the new iPad. It's a bit to get used to, as I've been a PC user my whole life. But it's rather nice to have something new to learn and play with. I've also been going down a rabbit hole of a new TV program (new to me) Downton Abby. Y'all I'm in love with this show. 

Also I'm seriously falling in love with my new cat Ba-boy. He's so sweet. Don't get me wrong I loved and miss bella, but he is going to be a great friend and companion for years to come. 

So things are good. Plugging away on the YouTube channel, and the podcast. 

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